How to Stay Motivated to Exercise as a Busy Parent

You started well. Three workouts in the first week, two the next, then a sick kid, a late night at work, and suddenly it is three weeks since you last trained. If that sounds familiar, you are not lazy and you are not broken. Most parents I meet are not short of willpower; they are short of sleep, time and headspace. Learning how to stay motivated to exercise is less about pumping yourself up and more about making training easier to do on the days you do not feel like it.

After more than 10 years coaching mums and dads in Archway, here is what I have seen actually work.

How to stay motivated to exercise when motivation runs out

Here is the honest truth: motivation comes and goes for everyone, including me. The people who keep training are not more motivated than you. They have set things up so that they do not need to be motivated every single time. So instead of waiting to feel like it, focus on the things you can control.

1. Find your real reason

“Get fit” is too vague to get you out of the door on a cold Tuesday. Dig a level deeper. Do you want to keep up with your kids at the park? Carry the shopping up the stairs without your back complaining? Feel like yourself again? Write your reason down in one sentence and put it somewhere you will see it. When your energy dips, that sentence does more than any quote on Instagram.

2. Make the first step tiny

The hardest part of any workout is starting. So lower the bar for starting. Tell yourself you will just put your trainers on and do five minutes. Most days you will carry on. On the days you do not, you still kept the habit alive, which matters more than one great session.

3. Track what you do, not just what you weigh

Scales bounce around and can kill motivation fast. Track things you can see improving: the number of sessions you did this month, how many push-ups you can manage, whether you can now go up the Highgate Hill without stopping. I have a full guide to tracking fitness progress without scales if you want ideas.

4. Choose something you do not hate

If you dread running, do not build your plan around running. The NHS physical activity guidelines for adults recommend 150 minutes of moderate activity or 75 minutes of vigorous activity a week, plus strength work on at least 2 days. There are many ways to get there: brisk walking, cycling, dancing, circuits, lifting weights. Pick the ones you can tolerate, and ideally the ones you enjoy.

Expect the motivation dip (and plan for it)

Almost everyone hits a dip a few weeks in. The novelty wears off, results feel slow and life gets busy. Knowing it is coming takes away a lot of its power. A few things that help:

• Have a “minimum” version of your week. If your normal plan is three sessions, your minimum might be one session plus a couple of brisk walks. On rough weeks, you hit the minimum and call it a win.
• Never miss twice. Missing one session is life. Missing two in a row is the start of a new habit, so make the next one non-negotiable.
• Remember how you feel after. Before a session you feel tired. After it, most people feel better. Make a note of how you feel after each workout and read it back when you are wavering.

Use other people

Motivation is much easier to borrow than to create. Training with a friend, telling your partner which days you are training, or joining a group where people notice when you are missing all make it more likely you will turn up. I have written more about this in my post on workout accountability.

This is a big part of why small-group classes work for busy parents. At SYP Bootcamp, classes have a maximum of 10 people, so I know everyone’s name and I notice when someone has not been in for a while. You do not have to plan the workout or decide what to do. You just turn up for 45 minutes and the rest is taken care of. You can see this week’s class times on the booking page.

Make it fit your real life

A lot of lost motivation is really a scheduling problem. If your plan needs you to train at 6am and you are up three times a night with a toddler, it will fail, and you will blame yourself. Look honestly at your week and find the slots that will survive a bad week. Shorter, regular sessions beat long ones you can never fit in.

FAQs

Why do I lose motivation to exercise so quickly?

Usually because the plan relied on feeling motivated, was too ambitious for your current life, or you were judging progress only by the scales. Simplify the plan, lower the bar for starting and track wins like consistency and strength.

How do I motivate myself to exercise when I am tired?

Commit to just five or ten minutes, and choose gentler movement such as a brisk walk on very tired days. If tiredness is constant or unusual for you, speak to your GP to rule out anything else going on.

Is it better to exercise alone or in a group for motivation?

It depends on you, but many people find that a group, a training partner or a coach makes them far more consistent, because someone expects them to show up and the planning is done for them.

Stop relying on willpower

If you are tired of starting over every few weeks, let a small group carry some of the load. Book my £15 class, check this week’s class times on the booking page, and come and train with other parents in Archway who get it. Any questions, WhatsApp me on 07301 512215.

If you would like someone checking in on you every week wherever you are, my online coaching with SYP Fitness is another option.

About the author

Artem Olekhnovych is a personal trainer in Archway and the founder of SYP Fitness and SYP Bootcamp. He has coached clients in Archway, Highgate and across North London for over 10 years, and runs small-group bootcamp classes for busy mums and dads. Read reviews from his 1-1 clients.